Monday, March 2, 2009

The Gourmet {2}

Tepid Review of Dining at La Maison en Désordre
by Michaela Byrd, age 13 1/2 months


When I'm in the area, I dine at La Maison en Désordre on L Avenue. This is more out of necessity than enjoyment. The fare is mediocre, at best. The establishment is tucked away on a busy street, and the noise of passing cars is frequently muffled by the dull roar going on inside the dining room. I always request the best seat in the house, and because of my status as a world renowned food critic, I always get that seat...in front of the window, the place to be seen and heard. It's cushy and, well, high. It affords the diner a superior view of the restaurant. A small, fluffy dog lends a European flair to a dining area otherwise devoid of any charm.
I'll start with the positive. La Maison features live entertainment. There. They have entertainment. I didn't say it was good entertainment. Miss Nollie provides song and dance routines during the first course. Her repertoire consists of bouncing dance moves and tunes like "Jingle Bells" and "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star." Riveting.


During my most recent dining experience, the chef (who is a lovely woman) tried to pass a mess of peas off as a gourmet meal. Imagine that! I politely let her know that the disgusting green concoction on my tray (this 'Burg hot spot has trays!) was not the lobster bisque I requested.


After a lengthy argument, she returned with a pleasing dish that I've never sampled before. Some sort of turkey rolled into a pocket with a real pop of flavor inside. The flavor was familiar somehow, but I just couldn't place it.


A glass of Sauvignon Blanc would have been the perfect pairing with this acceptable meal, but the chef presented me with whole milk instead. I was unimpressed.


Overall, I give La Maison en Désordre two stars for their creativity with the turkey dish. I would consider returning again if the chef would agree to prepare my meal in a timely manner and serve more than two courses. Really. Are we barbarians? The next thing you know, I'll be expected to resort to eating with my hands. Ahem.


{Editor's Note: When interviewed, the head chef claimed that the reviewer's screaming was distracting to the other diners. "Multiple attempts to satisfy Miss T were made, but her palate is obviously too sophisticated for our menu." she reported. "The turkey pockets were really just a slice of turkey wrapped around some peas. Miss T didn't seem to notice."}





















You expect me to eat this filth?

5 comments:

  1. You really have a flair for writing. You take the mundane, everyday life things and make them so funny. Have you seen Bella magazine? It is a free publication in the Roanoke/Lynchburg/Lexington/Charlottesville area. I just know that you could write for them. I could send one to you, if you can't find anything about it on-line.

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  2. I had no idea you are such a talented writer Miss Amanda! I although I will NOT be dining there, I enjoyed reading your restaurant review!

    This post ended with such a precious picture of little MB!

    I also love your new header!

    Donna

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  3. Dear Ms Byrd,

    After reading of your horrendous dining experience at La Maison en Désordre, I feel I must recommend another eating establishment in hopes that you will not take away a poor impression of all restaurants in our fair city.

    There is a wonderfully eclectic spot in the hip downtown area known as the P.Street Cafe. I know of several little children who eat their breakfasts & lunches there on a regular basis---though they are rarely seen during the dinner hour. The atmosphere is very unpretentious and full of lively conversation. The food is always homemade, though not always from scratch, and is followed by a delicious array of desserts---if you eat all your vegetables.

    If you plan to be in the area, please do call ahead for seating, and try to ignore P. Street's low marks posted by the health department. After all, has a little cat hair ever really hurt anyone?

    Sincerely,

    EBR

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  4. I definitly think you should write for that magazine. You are awesome and so inspiring. I feel like I am right there, next to you and the family in every blog.

    p.s. Our little hometown does have a local newspaper that is weekly. They are always looking for good employees if you ever want to venture to the cold midwest. You would be an asset to the business. Would love to have you close by.

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  5. Oh, this is so funny, girl....you really are gifted and have a wonderful sense of humor. Haven't you longed to write? Go for it!

    As for the Bible Studies at my church; we are a small church, growing....as of yet, we've really only had one or two Women's Bible studies going on at one time. WE are about to move into our own building, so that may change as we grow! Loved this study and loved the one we did last year, Your HOME a place of Grace, by Susan Hunt. Glad you are enjoying yours....Bible study feeds the soul whereas mommyhood can be a sucker to the soul!! :)
    Suzanne

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I love to hear your feedback! Please feel free to leave comments...just don't send me spam asking me to buy stuff off your website! I've got three kids and no money to purchase your magic weight-loss pill or bust enhancement, or whatever else you might be selling. Thanks, and I look forward to hearing from you! :)

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