4 hours ago
Monday, December 22, 2008
Inappropriate Christmas Carols
These were my sister's final thoughts on "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" tonight as we rode around town looking at lights. It had just come on the radio, and we were passing a delightfully tacky display. It was dark in the backseat (Mimi was driving), and we were separated by Su-Su, otherwise I would have slapped her upside the head.
"You really didn't know that the little girl was singing about seeing her father dressed up as Santa Claus, but she doesn't know it?" I asked incredulously.
"What? I thought the mom was kissing Santa. That's inappropriate, Manda."
It took Su-Su and I several tries to explain to Alison that the little girl in the song sees her father dressed up like Santa Claus, but she doesn't realize it's her father. It's like a funny little joke to her. Obviously to my sister this is a ballad of heartbreaking familial betrayal.
She's supposed to be the smart one. Right. I feel like I just told a kid that Santa isn't real. Am I spoiling the song for anyone else?
I leaned my head back as Nannie exclaimed over the same lights we saw last year.... She must have missed a few throwbacks of her mighty-water today because she did not remember the enormous blow-up Nutcracker (or, CrackerNut, as Natalie calls them) or the flashing gingerbread men or even the thousands upon thousands of lights plastered to every surface of home and yard.
As we passed the one house on the street that seemed to be boycotting the splendiferous displays (they only had one wreath on the door and a tree in the window, geez), I thought of a few more inappropriate carols.
What about "Baby, It's Cold Outside?" That man is clearly going to drug the young lady in an effort to keep her in his home (Glenn Beck analyzed this song cleverly on his show the other day). I'm sure there are more.
You have to be careful about what you let your kids listen to around the holidays, people!